Now, I don’t want you to think that this blog has gone dead, because it hasn’t. Just have been busy with school recently. But I know that you don’t wanna read about my everyday life, and I don’t blame you. You are here to laugh… and hopefully these next few stories will help you to do that.

Tyler

You know those days that your day just seems to be one bad thing after another? And it doesn’t even matter if you try to stay positive, because no matter what these things are gonna happen to you? Well my friend Tyler had one of these days last week. So… let’s have a good laugh WITH Tyler, cause, believe me when I say this, he was laughing when he told me.

So, Tyler woke up one day in a great mood, thinking that it was gonna be a great day; and it was… for everyone who got to see his stupid moments. He came into work at about 9 o’clock and just did the normal “work” thing for an hour. He went to get some coffee before going to fluids class, and it happened to be cold… He shrugged it off and said to himself, “It doesn’t matter, I just need the caffeine.” As he went outside he tripped on a crack in the concrete and jerk his coffee upwards, right into his face. He spilled it all over himself, because at our office, we have no lids. He stood there, and he says that he mumbled, “At least I got some of it in my mouth.” So he rushed to the bathroom before class to wash it off.

After class he dropped his miniature longboard, just like always, to role on outta there…  But when it hit the ground, the whole back bearing (wheels and all) fell off… Now how’s that for a day… Well start of the day, it was only 11 o’clock by that time. If I was him, I would have looked up and been like, “Really? Was that necessary?”

Olive Garden

I went to the olive garden this past weekend with my roommates, some other friends, and my girlfriend; and while we were there, we had some of the most epic/stupid conversations I have ever heard (the waiters/waitresses seemed to enjoy it).

Now, you might not know me that well, but even though I am a vegetarian, I am capable of putting back some large quantities of food. Well, it was all-you-can-eat pasta night at the Garden and I decided that I wanted to get my moneys worth, so I was debating how many bowls of pasta I was going to get. I told the table, “Hell, if i’m gonna do this I might as well make a record.” So, when the waitress came back I asked her what the record amount of bowls was for the all-you-can-eat pasta meal. Let me remind you that they give you salad and breadsticks as well, so I was pretty full after one bowl of pasta. Anyway, the waitress looks at me and goes… “9. 9 bowls of pasta.” I looked at Lef and he said, “What?! Was that the table record, cause we want the personal record.” She smiled back and said “Nope… just one person, but his ass did take up 2 seats.” We burst out laughing and Jessie said, “Well they charge per chair so technically it was only 4.5 bowls.” I was almost in tears at this point, and the comment that pushed me over the edge was Pat’s. So, I’m guessing you want to hear it… Well that’s too bad.

Just kidding. Pat then said, “Well who knows, maybe he was going into hibernation.” And it may have been one of those “had to be there moments,” but I promise I was almost on the floor laughing. And as the waitress walked away… I could see tears in her eyes from laughing.

I hope that you enjoyed the last few stories, and I’ll post another soon. Until then…

Cheers,

Devin